by the OneCare Group Editorial Team
Dealing with Racism
Racism is unfavourably judging or behaving towards someone on account of their ethnicity. As with bullying, the victims are often blamed by the bullies and bystanders for being distressed by it. “Just ignore it” or “Don’t be so sensitive” or “But it wasn’t targeting you.” As a result, the receiver of racist comments is made to feel that the onus is on them to move on, to forget, and that it is their fault for being upset. It’s easy to blame the receiver if they report it, rather than just “take it”. If you feel you have been the target of racist comments or behaviour, talk about it. Share your experience with a trusted friend or colleague who will be able to empathise with you.
You may be feeling a range of emotions. Shame… Anger… Isolation. Racism is a particularly hurtful form of discrimination and bullying because it targets our identity, and a group to which we have a sense of belonging. Identity and belonging are at the core of human experience, therefore racist behaviour can leave you feeling unsure of yourself.
A natural response to racism is pressure to disprove the stereotype, to perform well, to dispel beliefs people have about your race. In such instances, you feel that you represent your entire race, and therefore you cannot afford to make any mistakes, and this is a big responsibility. This adds to feeling demotivated, isolated and distressed.
There is also a collective anger – feeling angry on behalf of all your group. It is easy to reactivate all the anger you’ve felt for each instance you or your loved ones have experienced. As a result, your reaction may be one of deep hurt and frustration. Though it is difficult, try to isolate each instance, and if you feel yourself getting overwhelmed, check yourself – all you reacting to one case or to everything?
The effects of racism have a cumulative effect, even from generation to generation, if inter-racial relations are not repaired. As a result, people can seemingly overreact to what appears to be on the surface, a benign comment or joke. To the person receiving it that joke would have been the most recent of several jokes, and perhaps other instances of being made to feel that they do not belong.
Do not get into a direct dispute. If you feel you can, understand that bullying comes from a place of lack of knowledge, and fear (and oftentimes a history of being bullied or victimized). Recognise that their words and actions are about them, and not a reflection of you, or your worth. With this, you should feel better-equipped to process what happened.
If racism is effecting your daily life, and your mood and you find yourself frequently feeling low about racist comments, or find that you are struggling with race-related stress everyday, consider doing something more than just reporting one-off incidents.
Find a support network. You could join Human Rights groups, even if you choose to be a passive member, such as by signing up to their newsletter. You will be able to keep updated with measures that are being taken locally and abroad to fight racism. Alternatively, consider joining a local group of people who have been through similar experiences. This group may be of a different race, but this can actually be helpful to see that other groups also struggle with the same discrimination.
Educate yourself about your heritage and the contributions of members of your ethnic group, and think of ways you can incorporate representing it in your daily life. These may include simply having a small trinket on your desk, a screensaver on your phone of a photo of a favourite image. Reminding yourself of the positive will have alleviate your feelings of shame.
Consider becoming socially active in groups. Lobby for change, write letters to newspapers and your local government representatives, detailing your experiences, and what you would like to see change in the community. For example, you might write about wanting to see anti-racism days in schools, where schools celebrate diversity.
If you are a bystander and have witnessed racism, you have a key role to play. You may report it, but you could also engage with the person making the comments or action. Ask them, what is it they fear about the group? With the victim, help them feel valued, safe and included. Remind them that not everyone has racist beliefs. Acknowledge that what they experienced was unfair. As an ally, you too can have an active role. You can join activist groups, or make small but meaningful steps in your community, such as establishing friendships or connections with people outside your racial group. Do not be afraid to ask questions, stating that you want to learn more about their experience of racism, and what you can do to support them.
If you feel you’re struggling because of racist behaviour you may have experienced, speak up and seek support.
References:
Center for Community and Development at the University of Kansas – Community Tool Box (2024) https://ctb.ku.edu/en/table-of-contents
UCSC Counselling and Psychological Services (CAPS) – Coping with Racism & Discrimination (2024) chrome-extension://efaidnbmnnnibpcajpcglclefindmkaj/https://caps.ucsc.edu/pdf/coping-with-racism.pdf
