Supporting men in their mental health struggle

by the OneCare Group Editorial Team

June is Men’s Mental Health month, a month dedicated to highlighting the urgent need to address the stigma surrounding men’s mental health.

At OneCare Group, when it comes to health and well-being, we are always happy to climb aboard and help.

Did you know?

• Each year, six million men experience depression.
• Ninety percent of people diagnosed with schizophrenia by the age of 30 are men.
• Men account for roughly 80 percent of suicide cases.
• Almost 75 percent of illicit drug users are men.
• Only one third of therapy patients are men.

Could you, or someone you know, be struggling with a mental illness?

Below are some of the signs to look out for:

• Increased irritability
• Aggression
• Escapist behaviour such as going out more, drinking or socialising more
• Avoiding family and friends
• Engaging in risky behaviour
• Digestive issues
• Irregular sleep
• Feeling restless, or numb and unable to enjoy anything

From infancy, men and women are raised to be different in emotional expressiveness. Girls are encouraged to talk about their feelings, whereas boys are bombarded with messages not to cry. Still today, the idea perseveres “big boys don’t cry”, and this message has permeated to our everyday life. Masculinity has connotations of being strong, and of being in control of emotions. This culture is even more prevalent in the maritime industry, where seafarers are expected to be strong, and able to withstand the emotional toll of the job. There is also a real fear that speaking about mental health problems will have consequences on future contracts.

In a UK-based survey, the most cited reason for not talking about a problem is that men believe that they are dealing with it, and don’t want to burden anyone with their problems. They feel ashamed to admit that they are struggling, and don’t want to admit it or appear weak.

Men are not only raised not to talk about emotional difficulties, they also have trouble recognising when they are suffering from something. One study showed that most men do not distinguish between depression and stress, which means that they believe that their symptoms of depression may actually be “stress”. This means they are more likely to dismiss their symptoms, and this prevents them from seeing a need do something about, especially if their low mood and anxiety is partly due to work-related pressures.

For men, work can contribute to worsening mental health if they believe they are not skilled enough to meet the demands of their job; that they do not have a sense of control; they do not receive acknowledgement for their effort; and they have unrealistic expectations of themselves. Again, this is particularly relevant to seafarers, who have increasing demands on the amount of knowledge they are meant to have.

Other risk factors include:

• Marital difficulties
• Employment-related stress
• A history of trauma
• Family members with mental health issues
• Financial concerns

If you recognise that you may be experiencing depression or another mental health issue, seek support.

You may believe that reaching out for help may be a sign of weakness, but in reality, asking for help shows that you are taking responsibility for your well-being and that you are ready and willing to do something about it.

The field of Psychiatry and Psychology increasingly recognise the role of the four pillars of Mental Health – Sleep, Nutrition, Exercise and Social Connection.

These are fundamental and should be the first focus of your self-assessment.

• Do I get adequate sleep every day?
• Do I eat healthily?
• Do I exercise for 30 minutes a day?
• Do I feel I can talk to people, and that I have a support network?

However, men can be allies to each other by normalising talking about how they feel, normalising talking about mental health struggles, and about needing and receiving services.

If you want to support someone but don’t know what to say, you can refer to the following:

• Voice your concern and say you’re here to help and be a friend.
• Don’t feel obliged to say the right thing or fix the issue. Your role is to show them that they’re not alone, and not to be the expert or resolve their difficulties.
• Don’t minimise their concern. It may be tempting to say that they have nothing to feel bad about, or that other people have worse problems, as a way of reasoning with them that they shouldn’t feel so bad, but this will only make them feel worse.
• Encourage them to seek help.

Mental health problems can make you believe that you’re alone, and that you are the problem. Remember that several sources of help are available, and that you can become a support to others by seeking help and breaking the stigma surrounding men’s mental health.